Time: 0937am
Date: 4 June 2007



Well...Yesterday had a great with Rohit...And yes...He's damn great to be with...ANy topic either one of us will start up first...Boring..Tomorrow will be his flight...Fast right...???
But it will be just one month then he will come back again but not sure where he will headed next...Hopefully no la...
He such a great person.....Hahahaha...
SO sweet..Everytime when go out with him, he will bring me to the different experience...As in...He was the first guy who brought me to the car road show on our first met...Then, yesterday he brought me to Fort Canning Park...
He asked me what type of place I wanna go adn I replied anything but then he asked me to choose...Noisy or quite....Then I answered in between...He brought me there...
Quite romantic the place there...Ok, not bad...
Hahaha..Also my first time there...But after that, in our next meeting, not sure where will he bring me this time...
Well...Will miss him...This year is really his travelling year la...In and out of Singapore.....Haiz...
& I miss someone who is known as Sweetheart...
Well...U know who are u...
Hehehehe...K, till here...
Going to market la...Hahahaha...
Accompany meri dadiji...
Take Care
SaLaam

Time: 0138pm
Date: 1 June 2007



Well...Life so far been ok but the sad thing was my mum was admitted to hospital and today, later on I'm going with my aunt to fetch as she will be discharge tomorrow...
SyukurALhamdullillah...
She just stayed at the hopsital for only 4 and 1/2 days only...
Thanks to ALLAH...
As day past, she really feels better...Insya'ALLAH, she will recover fast...(AMIN)
Btw...Good news that cheer me up yesterday...
Guessed what, Rohit is BACK...
Yea!!! I'm going to meet him this weekend...Porbably will be either tomorrow which will be Saturday or Sunday...
And this time he just wants most probably just the two of us...Of course public but less people...Naa...It's hard but we can relax at the Starbucks or u know any cafe so that we can concentrate and chat...He wants to talk to me more...
Like last time it was like short but a memorable time...So this time...Let's see...
What will happen...
Btw, yesterday, I talked with him on the phone for about 20 minutes and guess what..Both of us got something which is in common...Cool right...Naa...
But, that's great to know...Someone who is in common like urself...Well...Roughly la...
Anyway, later I will be fetching my mum tomorrow...And already recieve my last pay from the Veeko...Haiz...SyukurALhamdullillah...
Now, I have to get my payslip for the lat two months I worked with them...
I must get...Concern for others too much until people even badmouth about u...
Haiz.....Unbelieveable of them...
OK, wasting my time talking on about this unappreciate problems...
Haiz...Uncare people...
Tired...
Ok la...Till here...
Take Care
SaLaam

Time: 0138pm
Date: 1 June 2007



Well...Life so far been ok but the sad thing was my mum was admitted to hospital and today, later on I'm going with my aunt to fetch as she will be discharge today...
SyukurALhamdullillah...
She just stayed at the hopsital for only 3 and 1/2 days only...
Thanks to ALLAH...
As day past, she really feels better...Insya'ALLAH, she will recover fast...(AMIN)
Btw...Good news that cheer me up yesterday...
Guessed what, Rohit is BACK...
Yea!!! I'm going to meet him this weekend...Porbably will be either tomorrow which will be Saturday or Sunday...
And this time he just wants most probably just the two of us...Of course public but less people...Naa...It's hard but we can relax at the Starbucks or u know any cafe so that we can concentrate and chat...He wants to talk to me more...
Like last time it was like short but a memorable time...So this time...Let's see...
What will happen...
Btw, yesterday, I talked with him on the phone for about 20 minutes and guess what..Both of us got something which is in common...Cool right...Naa...
But, that's great to know...Someone who is in common like urself...Well...Roughly la...
Anyway, later I will be fetching my mum...And already recieve my last pay from the Veeko...Haiz...SyukurALhamdullillah...
Now, I have to get my payslip for the lat two months I worked with them...
I must get...Concern for others too much until people even badmouth about u...
Haiz.....Unbelieveable of them...
OK, wasting my time talking on about this unappreciate problems...
Haiz...Uncare people...
Tired...
Ok la...Till here...
Take Care
SaLaam

Time: 0428pm
Date: 28 May 2007



Btw, today is been a ok day...I'm fasting anyway...
Well...Very sad that today all the jokes and conversations was boring anyway...
Well...It's quite ok...
I'm fed-up with the repeating jokes...It actually mean it...
Well, sooner or later and I guessed let it over now...
Damn fed-up...
I over with watever that's happening to my Life at the moment...I'm tired...
Oh YA ALLAH...
Insya'ALLAH, I will meet Shariffudin M Raffi...
Take Care...
SaLaam

Time: 0235
Date: 27 May 2007



My life was great anw...
The past two days I been going out with on Friday was Lisa, my dearie... & yesterday was with mu cuz- Aish n Sofia...
It's Aisah b'day so I just treat her KFC...
Well...At least there' something I give...Then nothing...
Hhmmm...Was very fed up with one of my closes...She's get jealous of everything...
It's like we are like 'own blood' u know...
I been patience with her for so long...My patience its a breathe as time pass by...
She gets over with me in anything...She can't see me more than her...In everything from beauty to education and working and mostly all...
I can't understand why and now she's trying to get whatever I'm closing or someone is closing me, she's just trying to take it apart...Y does she have this kind of heart???
Hopefully it doesn't affect her Life in anything...
She is sometimes like 'world' lerh...
She is like sometimes ' face-wall'... Aren't she ashame of herself???
What to do...Hopefully my patience will be paid off in the future...Insya'ALLAH(AMIN)
Anw, she's my cousin and ISLAM doesn't teach the negatives thing...
Not like her...Can't believe this...She's trying to get 'name' all the way...
Ish, I'm not that bad as her..Not even a little like her...We both are different...
Sometimes, I like regret...But I think her as my cousin and btw I'm so far uncomparable to her...
Btw, wasting my time only talking all about her...
Ok...Another thing which is happening to my Life since this few days is that I'm suddenly like getting remembering by someone...
Not miss and hate...Love is no more...But then, y do I like out of a sudden like remembering him...
I hope it's not miss...
Y must he do this to himself and me...
Hopefully whatever I dreamt just now about the person whom I remembering so much will come true in the future...
Insya'ALLAH (AMIN)
Ok la...
Continue other days than...
My grandparents are soming...
Take care...
SaLaam

Time: 0259pm
Date: 24 May 2007



So far, Life been's ok...Well...Great not really...
I mean...It's ok...Everyone especially with Lisa, Munna, Abu...It's great u know...
Just missing Arin...
Well...Hopefully he will be all fine with his problems...
Insya'ALLAH..It's just that he's not here in Singapore...Anyway, whatever is, u will always I remember...Because u r also one of the person who helped me in my prob with that unfaithful guy...
All was just part of that pretending...I don't hate him or what it's just that it's sad that it's unbelieveable that the person whom u cherished did this to u...
I don't know why I'm not that angry with him or as if so really fed-up like that...
I don't know why...Probably, I am a kind-hearted person...See...I'm so good right...
Well, slowly I'm forgetting him...It's just the matter of time...
I know, I will meet the guy whom I've been waiting for...Insya'ALLAH(AMIN)
Thanks ALLAH that Munna was only released to prohibhition...
& now my mum, Ya ALLAH, Insya'ALLAH she will be fine...Hopefully she doesn't need to stay at hospital at least...After that can go home (AMIN)
Well...
Everything's will be fine...
Just be patience and pray for the best...
Insya'ALLAH(AMIN)
K la all...
Till here...
Take care
SaLaam

Time: 0116pm
Date: 23 May 2007



So far...
I ended with him a fullstop...It's hard...I know...If I'm still going to continue on just like that and also with his ego...Nothing gonna change...
I'm not sure...Whether we going to be the same anymore...
It's hard for now...But slowly...I know...
Munna and Abu...
The good guy frens which is very comfortable with me...
Hopefully we will be with each other till time pass by...
Now, I already know...
The truth of every relationship is about connections...
It's about not saying it but proving it then u can say it out...
I believe the fact is that we are human beings but then stills no excuses...
We can think with our brains well...
Once we did that mistake...No repeating it...
Whatever is, I will take it as an experience in my Life...
Chances and adjustments...I have tried it before also...
Whatever is...
It's just upto my heart and mind...
And myself of course...
I like sometimes just suddenly thinks of him...
But then...
What's the point if he's not interested...
If a person is interested...He will do in any what way at least.....
It's obvious and finalise now...
Sometimes in Life...
Gals have to take the first step...
It's like welll, hard because that position should be in aguy position...
But then, let it be...
Whatever is, I got my Munna and Abu with me...
And now, I wait...
Hahaha...
With two good frens u wouldn't wanna lose...
What more u can ask from them???
Just be there when I need u and same goes to me...
Hahahaha...
We are just fun...
K la...Till here...
Going out with my dearie Lis...
Take Care All...
SaLaam

Time: 0325pm
Date: 22 May 2007


I write these words to say goodbye
I have to do it in person, I don't care and cry
I thought you are my true bestfren
I'm hoping to amend
I don't want to leave
But even though in silence,
between you & me, nothing has achieve
My dreams
So it seems
I must go
But before I do, I want you to know
I was truthful to you in every way I say and do
So Jaspal
This is the end
It's time we apart
It's something I must do........

Time: 1210pm
Date: 21 May 2007


......................What my bro ask me to take it as........................

Time: 1056am
Date: 21 May 2007




It's been a few days since I last updated my blog...
Was just busy and tired...
I thought everything was gonna be alright but then the feeling keeps on come back and fade away...It's like haunting me...Whatever Abu said its true...
Well...I feel so uncomfortable and guessed what...Yesterday, I just followd my ehart..Without any feelings or whatever, I just don't know what has happened to me suddenly...My heart felt that I have to talk...Yes, talk this out so that my heart knows the fact...I don't care what will it be or is it good or bad but the important is whether he is the 'same' as what am I...
I'm just a truthful person..Honestly and sincere...
But, for this bestfrenship of proposal from him, I have accepted with all my heart...
I thought and thought because of this feelings keep on haunting me with so many questions...And I'm like wondering with myself with so many answer.....
Because just one thing...No one is willing to step forward for this...
It's either he just don't care anymore and was not serious about this relationship...
He was just fooling around like how all my loved ones has said this to me...
Or he still listen to one of his galfrens and maybe that she is like having 'a feeling' for this Jaspal and started to cysco his mind maybe...
See...There are many answers...
So, I'm confused...And sometime, this might lead me to stress...
Yesterday, I called him...We both sounded pefectly strangers...
We are like never ever talk before...
Not like for the first time we talked and everything was just so different...
So as a sign of respect...I talked about how is he and how's day and u know normal talking...
Then after that, I knew that he was watching a movie as he was at his goodfren's house...
So I thought I was disturbing but then he said no...Later on, he asked me to called back after half an hour and I called back after 50 minutes...Two missed called instead...
Later on note even any SMS from him...
It proves everything like before but not the answer which scores from his mouth...
So, at night after came back from going out with my family, I SMSed him with a please to talk...Then he replied later as he was eating...
After 1hour 20 minutes, he SMSed that he will be going out with his fren and can't talk...From the way he SMS was like something like 'an escape' so then I replied that it's ok...It's not a normal talk anyway and it's an important things to talk...I really hope he will have a moment to talk as after that, I will never disturb him forever...
Guess what he straight replied...
Three times, and afetr that a miss called from him and after that he SMSed me again to call him but then...Only I replied I was busy and will get back to him later...
Wow...He is like what...
Now, I guessed it's either he wants to end this tied with us as soon as possible or maybe u know it's the other way round...
Abu told me is that he is an ego...This is all was just about his egoistic...
So later on...
We will see what happen...I will finalise with him by today...
And after that...We are just friends, u know casual friends or not...I don't care...
All I care is...I'm waiting for my Mr Right to come...
Because...I believe, when one go, one will come...
When u want something or needed something in Life, the important things or person whom that u are not willing to lose will eventually be apart because there will be much better for u...
So, I will just take it this way...
If he wants to save this bestfrenship...I will consider...Because honestly, I have done my part as a bestfrenship for this ties between us to save...Even though with his 'don't care' way or whatever it is, I have patience with this...I'm trying to let it be just like for the past two weeks but then, it's hard...
Because the feelings keeps on haunting back at u.....U don't know the finalise answer from himself...So that's why...
Sometimes, whether is it my fault or what...I'm not sure and very confused...
All for now is just that, I have to think of myself...Because, I have patience with this so much...
It's strange that bestfren behave this way...
Even with an opposite genders...
I guessed he doesn't know what's the meaning of a bestfren...
All I will say a final goodbye with him is that...
I'm afraid that I thought I might lose u but it's u are the one who is losing an appreciate truthful bestfren...
All the memories with him and whatever it is...Will be a sweet false time between us...
It's just as a clearly view that there are human beings who are wearing 'mask' behind them...
Even though we don't know each other for a year...
Well...
If u r also a ' not good with words' person...U can still think and get the feeling...When u can get the negative feelings automatically...
It's not about knowing...It's about how much...
Don't care the distance but care the feelings...
And its not about false but its the truth...
It's not about pretend but it's about treasuring...
No thanks but appreciate...
Can't believe ur so called long lost contact fren asked me to treasure u...
Well, I treasured u more than my loved ones...
I believe by now...From this kind of fact...
Well...A maybe or not...
We were bestfren but now...Strangers for Life...
Thanks for those false identity...
I wish u all the best in ur Life...
May u don't pass this Journey of Life like mine...
Hopefully, u don't experience like how I experience...
It's full of pain and hurts...
Full of false and ignoring...
Full of uncare and destroying ownself...
Get stressed and might can be mentally unnormal...
And no believe between one another...
The relation ties was not strong because only one was willing to give anything reasonly...
I tried all my part more than everything I could do...
I getting weaker as each time pass...
Knows that every moment represent more than it...
A minute to an hour and an hour to a day...
A day to a week and a week feels like a month...
Getting tired but everything will comes back haunting and fades away again...
Broke down unconditionally...
Mood swings...Na...
Hopefully...U will know how much I have experienced this with u...
There's more but it's just wordless...
Sometimes, somethings are hard to explain and can't be explain...
Hopefully u know someday...
The moment, the time will come for u to experience like how I did...
Then hopefully u will reprent as not to make the same mistake again...
To anyone who u will meet through ur Journey...
Wish u all the best...
Take care...
SaLaam